Source: DENVER MATCHMAKING SERVICES FAIL
If you read through the bulk of the reviews of many Denver dating services and Denver matchmakers you will see a consistent theme. That the people who used them were not introduced to people who fulfilled their criteria and preferences. That is constant across the board…except for Bon Jour Matchmaking Service. Don’t think there’s even one review stating anything like that!
So, after 29 years and an established clientele and as a REAL professional Denver Matchmaker, the fact that I interview every single client allows me to know without a doubt the types of qualities my clients are searching for in a mate. That is TOTALLY dictated by the clients, I HAVE ALMOST NOTHING TO DO WITH IT! To achieve what they have hired me to do I need to have the types of clients who fit their requested criteria. So when people call who are outside of that and I know that emphatically, it would be unethical for me to accept them as a client. Unethical both for my current clients and for a prospective client. Is that a really tough concept to grasp???? It seems so…
Yes, during the FREE phone consultation I will ask questions to qualify you just as you will ask to qualify me. But I don’t make the rules of who is and is not a fit. That is almost strictly done by my clients. Of course if I perceive that we are not a good match or that you are not grasping the concept in the way I need you to I will decline to work together. That is why Bon Jour does not have reviews like the other services about clients’ criteria and preferences not being followed.
My own criteria is whether you “get it”…the structure, philosophy, concept and whether you and I will work well together to achieve your goal. So there are a myriad of reasons someone may not be a fit…if I accepted everyone who called I’d be a millionaire ten times over, which I’m not. That is not my goal. I am not driven by money but by the success of my clients which has shown over these 29 years!.
In the past two weeks I have declined to work with about 10 singles who called for Bon Jour Matchmaking. In case it is not clear that means I turned down a minimum of $20,000 in income!
WHY? It’s called being ethical. I know that is a foreign term in these days of greed, but after 28 years of Denver matchmaking with Bon Jour being so specialized I know from interviewing EVERY client their preferences and flexibility.
Sometimes you absolutely can’t win even when you are trying to be honest and ethical. One of the women I declined (“Olimpia”) wrote a nasty review on YELP. She should have thanked me for not lying to her and taking her money knowing she would not be successful specifically in this service NOT the whole world…this service! EVERY time I decline to work with someone that effects my income, every time.
My clients make it perfectly clear what they are looking for in a mate which includes physical traits obviously. My women are clear that they prefer men 5’9″ or taller with comparable educations and income to theirs. My men specify no women larger than a size 10. That’s just the way it is. I wouldn’t be much of a Matchmaker or business woman if I ignored their criteria or preferences like most other Denver matchmaking services (read their reviews).
There are many, many reasons that I decline to work with someone and height and size are only two of the reasons. Read through the list of things that make someone a poor candidate for Bon Jour.
If I sound angry you bet I am. If “Olimpia” had been a client and I had lied to her about her success that would be a legitimate reason to write a bad review. But to write a bad review because of her hurt ego when I was honest and ethical is ridiculous. This is the kind of attack that makes me consider whether I want to continue doing this. Again, I turn down thousands of dollars a year in an effort to be ethical and not take advantage of vulnerable people!
I was recently asked what makes me a good matchmaker. I took that question very seriously and gave it some thought before responding. Looking back over 29 years of Denver matchmaking I don’t think it’s just the matching that is my strength or the strength of this Denver matchmaking service.
- Giving all clients the time for their best match to present in the service by virtue of my open-ended contract has something to do with it;
- The amount of information shared with each client contributes to making the best choices;
- Allowing clients to meet as many people as they feel could be their best mate;
- The reasonable filing/investment fee in joining Bon Jour so that appropriate singles feel comfortable with this investment;
- The length of time I have been practicing matchmaking by coaching, interviewing and meeting every single client by means of the structure of this matchmaking service; and
- Last but not least…the ongoing intensive coaching before, during and after couples meet to mitigate so many initial issues within the first couple of months of a potentially permanent relationship.
Matchmaking is so much more than just throwing people together and letting them sink or swim. Many people put up obstacles that diminish their chances of a relationship progressing. They need someone objective to have the guts and insight to point out those habits and zeroing in on things that, in the scheme of a lifelong relationship, just are not important. That is my goal for you…a lifetime relationship!
Singles hire a matchmaker because they are having trouble of some kind in their interactions with dating. Yes, it is to find the right person who has as yet been elusive, but there may be many things you yourself are doing that derail, curtail or just plain prevent successful long term relationships.
One glaring example is you are difficult or impossible to connect with. Whether it be by phone or setting up meetings or dates. If I have trouble getting you on the phone that alerts me that my clients may also have difficulty that may cause them to get frustrated and just move on. If that’s how I feel you can be sure that’s how they will feel. If I find this the case before you even become a client (which happened this morning) I will suggest that you contact another Denver matchmaking service. My clients expect and deserve reliable people to meet for potential relationships.
If I find that you do not follow directions well even though I repeat them over and over it will discourage me from working with you as there are contracts stating timing that you have to adhere to and other things that, as a client, you need to follow through on as there is usually someone waiting for an answer (someone meaning a prospective match or me).
Whether you are in Bon Jour Matchmaking Service as a client or out in the world dating, look at the obstacles you are putting in the way of smoothly getting to know someone and cultivating a potential relationship. Actions that may be discouraging, frustrating or just plain turning good potential mates off. THAT is what I help with, that is the coaching in Bon Jour Matchmaking that is so invaluable!