YOU KNOW YOU’VE BEEN SUCCESSFUL AT MATCHMAKING WHEN…

As one of the original professional matchmakers since 1989 the best testimonies to my success are imitators.  On a daily basis I find people from all over the world studying my website for tips as to how to structure and operate a successful matchmaking service.  One of the more blatant examples in the United States is Renee Piane who developed her business directly from my structure, press kit and articles.

Of course the other gauge of success are all of the marriages facilitated through Bon Jour Matchmaking Service, the oldest Denver matchmaking service.  I am even more proud of the fact that most of those marriages happened with either the first or second match for one or both parties.  I attribute that to the extensive profile on each client along with their photos that are shared with prospective matches.

So in this 26th year of professional Denver matchmaking Bon Jour stands out amongst other Denver matchmakers in numerous ways.

I DON’T ACCEPT EVERYONE WHO CALLS BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE

In receiving a FREE phone consultation call today from a 47 year old woman I could tell in minutes that this is not someone I would be able to assist or want to work with.  I was very direct and clear about that and although she could dish it out, she wasn’t as good at taking it.  She was shocked that I would turn her down (because you better believe that no other service would, they’d want her money) and I pointed out that isn’t it better that I don’t accept you as a client and take your money knowing I can’t help you rather than lie and just take your money?????

I will always be honest with you to the best of my knowledge through this FREE phone consultation as to whether I feel you have a good chance in the service and we can work well together or not. If I don’t feel the above I will not accept you as a client and suggest alternatives.

However, like with a recent client, the phone consultation went great, we had a great rapport so he joined the service.  He was very concerned about the very minimal investment fee that he was paying and brought it up every time we communicated.  Unfortunately once he became a client his attitude changed and when asked to follow through on things he not only didn’t but did not communicate that he couldn’t or why.  The reason always turned out to be that he was too busy…but he always mentioned the investment fee. When we first spoke he was focused and eager to find his mate, once he joined he didn’t walk the talk…we are no longer working together.  I had no way of knowing he would have an attitude change after he became a client.

Do you know there is a service in town who charged my most recent new client $5600 for 18 months and 12 “dates”.  She said NONE of the men met her criteria and she was told by the men that they were allowed to see pictures of her but the women never see pictures of the men.  Also they only read you a paragraph about the person THEY have chosen for you.  The last man she was set up with it turned out was not even a client of the service but a friend of the owner.  So she paid this ridiculous exorbitant fee and he paid nothing.  Can you guess which service?  It is a local Denver “matchmaking service” not a franchise.

I’m asking you to understand that paying a service $4,000+ does not get you a better service.  It merely makes that service rich.  READ the reviews, they are all the same.  Read the reviews of Kelleher on this site under Blog as well as Millionaire Matchmaker.  They both charge up to six figure fees and do less for their clients than I do!

ANYTHING ELSE IS MERELY AN IMITATION

Bon Jour Matchmaking Service is the name of a service, however matchmaking is a calling.  This isn’t just what I do, this is who I am.  In 1989 I felt that calling which became my career.  As with any successful career there will be imitators.  That was pointed out to me by a friend of 40+ years who, back in 1997 gave his sister, Renee Piane, my Press Kit detailing the structure and philosophy of Bon Jour.

I shared my Press Kit with the Piane family at the time because I had known them for years and had moved away in 1981 from back east to Denver.  It crossed my mind briefly that I was taking a chance leaving this information which was meant for future clients and the press with the Pianes but I trusted them and assumed they would just be proud of what I had created and accomplished.

Well I guess they were as in short order my structure and philosophy appeared on a website for Renee Piane.  I happened to see it and it was no coincidence that she had actually taken the wording from my Press Kit verbatim and transferred it onto her website.  Another old friend of mine from Denver who moved to California and worked for Renee told me that she regularly “borrowed” ideas from other venues.  For me matchmaking is a calling, for others it is a business.  Like so many other dating/matchmaking companies she has expanded into many areas to generate income and basically, like so many others, it is a money machine.

I can’t help but be flattered and fulfilled that she, and I dare to say others around the United States and the world based on my STATS page, have taken my structure and philosophy and made a business venture from it.  So in these past 25 years I have not only forged 300+ marriages but also inspired so many people to imitate my creation.  Sadly, like Ms. Piane, they rarely match-make anymore as they are so busy going off in other directions and now focus on the bottom line.

You can tell the difference between a “calling” and a “business venture” by the many directions they go in an effort to make money, rather than basic matchmaking to stay true to a “calling”.  I can tell by the amount of time people spend from different states and countries what their agenda is because it says boldly on this site that I only work with singles living in the Front Range of Denver.

Bon Jour Matchmaking is what it has always been and was meant to be…a straight forward old-fashioned matchmaking service.  There are elements that have been brought into the 21st century, i.e., this Blog and website, but the original philosophy and the way the service is run has remained true to my calling.  This is not a money machine, this is my passion.  Anything else is merely an imitation.

IS THIS YOU? THEN YOU ARE A GOOD PROSPECT FOR BON JOUR MATCHMAKING

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Just to try and make things simple (hopefully) following is a list of traits that will tell you if you and Bon Jour Matchmaking Service are a good match:

  1. You have read to some extent through this website.
  2. You understand the philosophy of Bon Jour as a matchmaking service NOT a dating service.
  3. You perceive my clients as a clientele NOT a database.
  4. You understand that meeting a bunch of people who do not fit your preferences and criteria is not what I do here.  I.e., packages of dates for a finite period of time.
  5. You understand that you are only matched with people both who fit your preferences and you fit theirs.
  6. You may meet as many people as you feel are an appropriate match, however the goal is to be discerning enough that you meet the “right” one on your first or second match…regardless of how long that takes to happen.
  7. You understand that this is not a race.  We are looking for the “right” person and that may take time thus the open-ended contract.  You are in the service until you reach your goal.

If you feel that this describes you then call me for your FREE phone consultation!

DENVER MEN, DO YOU LOOK LIKE THIS?

"Closer" Los Angeles Premiere - ArrivalsHughJackmanEvery day I receive calls at Bon Jour Matchmaking Service from single Denver men who exclaim they want beautiful, fit women to meet.  My question to you is do you look like Pierce Brosnan, Clive Owens or Hugh Jackman?  These are Hollywood’s sexiest men and not only because they are soooooo handsome but even more so because of who they’ve chosen to spend their lives with.  If you don’t look like any of these types of men, maybe you need to reassess the “beautiful model type” you are searching for.

These are long married and happy couples.  Not like the ones choosing only models who play musical wives.  And have you noticed, you don’t hear about these men cheating on their wives like with men who were married to beautiful women like Halle Barry, Sandra Bullock, Tiger Woods’ ex-wife or Jennifer Aniston and yes, even Christie Brinkley, etc.   Which are you?????

YELP REVIEWS OF BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE

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I guess I don’t understand how Yelp works…it seems to have lost all credibility.  There are positive reviews by clients that Yelp has hidden who have actually USED Bon Jour Matchmaking.  As soon as they get something negative they post it.  They shouldn’t be posting reviews of people who have never used the service.  At the bottom of my page on YELP it says 20 reviews not currently recommended…click on that and read those reviews also!

Currently there is a post by a Kirsten S. who has never been a client of mine.  She phoned me yesterday and I got up out of a sick bed and half asleep to chat with her.  I spent an hour explaining both how Denver matchmaking and Denver dating services work.  Going into great detail as to the differences in Bon Jour from the other local services.  As always I spent a lot of time answering her questions as I’ve been in this field for 25 years and have a lot of information to share.

Towards the end of the conversation she asked me questions that left me thinking that the information I shared went in one ear and out the other.  She never mentioned that she was in school for her Phd. so on her post I don’t even know if that is true.  Reading her review she STILL doesn’t get it, can you imagine that with all the info on this site as well as an hour phone consultation…anyway, your FREE phone consultation is exactly for this reason.

I assessed that she did not understand the philosophy of Bon Jour Matchmaking or the structure so I suggested that she keep looking for a more suitable matchmaking service and wished her good luck.  In short order she called back apologizing for I guess not getting it or not listening or something I presume trying to get me to reconsider, but it was clear to me that she would not make a good client.  I am very protective of my clientele and only accept about half the people who phone me for the service to keep it upscale and safe.  You can meet unstable people on the Internet and other services.

If her description of the service in her review had been correct I doubt I would still be matchmaking after 25 years.  It is absolutely scary that just because I declined to accept her as a client she would go to this length.  That has never happened before…ever!  Can you imagine someone complaining because I did NOT take their money?

She has now posted the same negative review on Yelp.com, Pissedconsumer.com and Kudzu.com on Bon Jour.  I sure made the right call on that.  Instead of thanking me for saving her the money (I quoted her my lowest fee BTW), she is dealing with my honesty by bashing a service she has never used and clearly does not understand.  I have another post on this Blog explaining that not all reviews are a reflection of the service, but rather the reviewer and their own issues.  This is obviously one of those.

MATCHMAKING AND TEACHERS…

Well, it’s happened again.  Contrary to my gut feeling (which is usually right), I agreed to work with a female teacher.  Why do I say this?  EVERY female teacher I have ever worked with in the past 25 years has, to put it gently, been a flake.

I’m specifically speaking of undergrad teachers, not professors at Universities or Colleges.  The most recent called for her FREE phone consultation at which time I quote her personal investment fee.  OBVIOUSLY it is wise to tell me anything that might possibly be a hindrance to your success, i.e., THREE divorces.  Had she been honest and forthcoming with that info, first of all I might not have even accepted her as that is a tough situation to overcome.  Second, I would have quoted her a lower investment fee because it is difficult to overcome.  But because she withheld that important fact I quoted her an appropriate fee for what she disclosed.

She arrived for the interview with the check already written.  When I reached the very early part of the questionnaire that asks about marriage(s) and divorces she told me to put down my pen while she explained.  Well it wasn’t like they were 2 month marriages, two were two years and one was five.  So they were actual marriages.  I explained she should have told me that and that might affect her success.  I also confided my difficulty working with teachers in the past and hoped that she would comply with the contracts she signed unlike the others.  She assured me she would.  It seemed she understood that Bon Jour Matchmaking Service is a matchmaking service and NOT a dating service.

She chose four men to meet and three declined, mostly due to a lack of attraction and/or the number of divorces.  One was currently involved with someone so he declined.  Hey, it happens.  Now she claims to have been fooled into this contract…I don’t remember locking her in my office and making her sign the contracts or forcing her to hand me a check rather than end the interview at that point and leave.

Three morals…one for me…NO MORE UNDERGRAD FEMALE TEACHERS!  The second for you…If you are hiring any type of service and it does not feel right to you, get up and walk out.  Don’t whine later that they misrepresented themselves to you.  YOU can always walk away.  The third for you…when you read negative reviews of companies, take them with a grain of salt as it just might be the customer/client, not the company who was the problem (unless there are multiple negative reviews).